The fact of letting go

All parents dread this phrase of “letting go”. Ironically we have to do it often and it never gets easier. That is why i think this should be a fact rather than an art of letting go.

My daughter was 18 months old when we decided to put her in a play group, some argued that she was too young. But we were adamant, she was getting bored at home, she needed other children, she needed to have fun, she needed to see other places , needed a routine and needed to understand that there are other figures of authority and discipline she needed to follow. All rational and valid arguments and all of them true. I hope she will learn a few flavors of all these in the 2 hours she was away from me.

But, the day before she was to start play group, a little voice inside of me started doubting my rational side. “What if she does not like it?” ,”God! How am I going to handle her tears every single day?”,”She is too young 18 months only”,”My baby is going to be away from me for 2 whole hours”,”She will think I abandoned her” … the crazy, hyper active imagination lady was in business. That day my husband took one look at me and said, “She is going tomorrow. She will be fine.” . That is it. I hoped he was right if not I would have not given him food for a week nor talked to him … see crazy hyperactive lady …

On the fourth day, I was not going to be there, I was to drop her off and go home, the teacher told me quite bluntly that my baby will be upset but she will be fine and I was to go home and not linger around the building. I think the teacher realized that I planned to linger around the building listening to my baby wail. How right she was!! I did linger around for a whole of 10 minutes then I decided that it was not worth it … that precise moment I had let go … That moment I had decided to trust my toddler,our decision, shown a little faith in her and let go… My daughter was wailing and calling out to me but I decided that she needs to be here and grow up a little…

My daughter actually adjusted very well and very quickly. She was fine within 2 weeks and began to understand that Amma will be back to pick her up in a little while, meanwhile she needed to play, sing, dance and run around with other toddlers. As I said we don’t give these kids enough credit. Set a routine they don’t hate too much, they will adjust and move on and not over analyse and think. I think I was lucky, some kids take longer to adjust to any environment.

Letting go, putting a little faith in the decision you have taken and trusting your child can be hard. Given the fact that you have done almost everything for them since the time they were born. But we tend to forget that they need to be themselves, grow and explore for them to be ready to fight this world they call home.